Hello, It has been like forever since I've visited with you. My seasonal letter to you is so joyous despite not knowing if you would visit me here. Well, obviously you are here reading and I thank you for your company.
This past year, I have decided to lay low, keep creating and not trying so hard at social. My decision to not engage in any local craft shows and not posting everyday nor spend too much time on Instagram has freed up a lot of time. It took a bit of getting used to the idea of doing less as the world is getting back to the new norm.
Maybe I am going through some existential crisis, maybe I am rebeling against being told what to do and when, maybe I long for the days of what you see is what you get, maybe I am silly or maybe I am just a human being.
Hello...out there...I am here finding my way...I know you are outhere also navigating your path. Everyday from the moment you get up, desicions are being made even if you set your routine to free you from decision fatique, you are still making the decision to stick to the routine. No wonder our heads get so stuffed up, we could hardly hear our own voice. Especially the loudness of social expectations, the how to's, the must do's etc. in order to excel in your internal operating system if you know what's good for you. Perhaps it's the dosage or the how you implement them into your life and when is the right time and most of all is it the right thing for you. It' the classic peer pressure, high school all over again. The herd mentality is primal, so strong for a reason...survival. It lives on in our digital age but it has morphed into something esoteric so we simply call it "stress". The modern person version of going out hunting and being chased by a tiger except you can't see the tiger but just a gnawing feeling of discomfort. So you try to expel the energy through physical exercise like a caveman running from danger, it works! until your joints decide to not cooperate. You know how the story ends, don't you? Well, I speak for myself but I am sure you can relate. I am forced to slow down so I get slow physically and mentally. Once in more quiet place, I can be more thoughtful with my action, not reaction. I said to myself what was I in a hurry for anyway??? lol... no good answer was my answer
Today I am the maker at Cinq, tomorrow I might be a squirrel, next week if I am lucky I get to be a tree. Not to worry, whatever I am I still would tinker away with my hands in my workshop. This much I know it's true.
Talking about tinkering, I have been making decorative objects that I will share in the year to come. Experimenting with different materials is so much fun. The unexpected results are both stressful and so delightful all at once. There are a lot of duds but once in while you get a stud! I go all giddy and it keeps me going back for the random discoveries.
There is no fun when a time invested project fails. It helps to have more time and head space to chew on the mistakes and get back to work. Overtime I have learned to include making mistakes as part of the authentic creating process hence no more failed projects only random discoveries and happy accidents. Hooray! must keep up with this mentality.
Nevertheless, I am human (most of the time), my brain still requires some convincing of this no fail creating process. So I keep on practicing.....making.....authenticly.